Jokes

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

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Have you heard about the new movie on constipation?

It's not out yet.

There was a traffic jam and the inevitable horn tooter was blasting away. Then a young woman in the car next to his leaned out and inquired sweetly. "What else did you get for Christmas?"

What's the difference between a bad marksman and a constipated owl.
One shoots but can't hit.
The other hoots but can't ****

Insanity in individuals is something rare – but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule. ~Friedrich Neitzsche

Friedrich Neitzsche - Comic actor, stand-up comedian and master of slapstick.

Sorely missed.

Originally posted by apathist
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

[hidden]He worked his problem out with a pencil.[/hidden]
[hidden]It was a no.2 pencil.[/hidden]

or, in a bad case

works it out in logs

(arithms)

Originally posted by Blood On The Tracks
or, in a bad case

works it out in logs

(arithms)

watch my natural log increase exponentially..

Originally posted by wolfgang59
Friedrich Neitzsche - Comic actor, stand-up comedian and master of slapstick.

Sorely missed.

"You would not enjoy Neitzsche sir, he is fundamentally unsound"

-P.G. Wodehouse

The problem with Nietzsche is that he was so damned depressed. Every time someone asked him what is wrong, it was always the same response, "Nothing".

"To do is to be" - Nietzsche

"To be is to do" - Kant

"To be, do be, do be, do" - Sinatra

Ignacius the deaf mathemetician is learning sine language.

Originally posted by sonhouse
Ignacius the deaf mathemetician is learning sine language.

The problem with math puns is that calculus jokes are all derivative, trigonometry jokes are too graphic, algebra jokes are usually formulaic, and arithmetic jokes are pretty basic. But I guess the occasional statistics joke is an outlier.

Originally posted by Captain Strange
The problem with math puns is that calculus jokes are all derivative, trigonometry jokes are too graphic, algebra jokes are usually formulaic, and arithmetic jokes are pretty basic. But I guess the occasional statistics joke is an outlier.

And, don't forget, calculus jokes are hard.

There once was a congressman named Weiner,
Who had a perverted demeanor.
He was forced from the hill, for acting like Bill.
Now Congress is one Weiner leaner